I Don’t Care Anymore, and It’s a Good Thing


I told God, “I don’t care anymore.” And He told me I finally understood humble surrender.

I’m a planner. I always have been, and it is a trait that has followed me—sometimes causing problems but always providing me with a sense of stability and safety. But when it comes to my life, and subsequently, my future, my plans aren’t really working out for me. If I’m being honest, I’m not doing that great of a job.

Growing up until now, if you had asked me what I wanted to be/do with my life, I would tell you: I want to be an author. I want to write books and speak on them, and through writing, help people. And I still do. It’s something on my heart that I feel was engraved there when I was created. However, I don’t care anymore.

Here’s Why I Don’t Care Anymore

If I am God’s … if I have surrendered my life to Him … that means everything about me is His. My dreams are His. My strengths are His. My weaknesses are His. My plans, hopes, desires, fears, hurts are His. My past is His. And so is my future. If I belong to Him, so does everything that forms who I am.

The truth is, I can plan all I want, but it is only when I follow God’s plan that I will ever experience true satisfaction and joy. And I know this is something you’ve probably heard before—a lot if you’ve spent much time in a Christian circle. I’ve heard it plenty of times, but it never really took root until recently. I heard it but never believed it. Or maybe I believed it but never enough to put it into practice.

But let me tell you, JOY (yes, the all-caps kind of joy) is something I’ve yet to experience in life but something I so desire.

I told God, “I don’t care anymore.” And He told me I finally understood humble surrender.

So I don’t care what it takes to have the life God desires for me, that he desires for all of his children. He desires for us to be blessed, have joy, experience community and love. Not only does God desire this for us, but the Bible says those who are righteous and who walk in the way of the Lord will experience these things and more!

Psalm 5:12 says, “Surely, Lord, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield.”

Psalm 16:11 says, “You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.”

Psalm 86:15 says, “But you, Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.”

We experience all that God has for us when we humbly surrender the entirety of our being to Him and simply say, “I don’t care anymore. Whatever Your will is, that’s what I want because I want to experience what You have for me more than I want to experience what I can provide myself.”

How to Humbly Surrender Your Life to God

True surrender isn’t something anyone can “teach” you into. It’s not something that comes from increased knowledge, watching more sermons, or listening to more Jesus music. It can’t be forced because it’s a matter of the heart. You have to be honest with yourself. Are you ready and willing to lay it ALL down? All of it?

That relationship?

Your finances?

That job?

Your friends?

Which church you should attend?

Your family?

Your future?

Your past?

Your desires and dreams?

Are you ready to release all of it? Give it all to God and let Him do as He pleases in your life? Whatever He has for you, rejoice in it and sing praises through it all? Are you ready to throw up your hands and declare, “I don’t care anymore!” and really mean it?

I am. I am ready for God’s plan instead of my own.

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*Humbly surrendering your life to God means there has to be an increased relationship with Him to know and follow His will for your life. This topic will be discussed next week; stay tuned!

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Photo by Hannah Busing on Unsplash

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